06/03/14 Graphics WBD Bryan Talbot

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Comment by Rosa Harkin on March 6, 2014 at 11:02

“Isn’t this beautiful, the tables have been turned, revenge is as sweet as this human flesh,” the badger smiled, swallowing a piece of human steak.   The crowd chatted excitedly about who will be the king of the animals, now that all the humans were nothing more than food.  The huge banquet was fully underway and soon the votes would be cast.


As Rat cut a slick, slice of human cheese, forged from the most delicate feet of ballerinas.   

    Badger turned and whispered into Rat’s ear, “you stand no chance against me, don’t even bother trying.  Leave now or you will lose the minuscule amount of dignity you have left.”   

     “You think that I cannot win with all the millions of votes from brothers and sisters on my side.” Rat hissed in reply. 

    Fish stepped forward and asked confidently, “Is there a problem, sir?”

   “Oh shut up you walking can of sardines, go back to your bath, you water breathing coward”.  Screamed Badger.   “You think, you or any other animal could rule over me and my kind?”

   Badger walks off laughing, knowing he cannot be stopped.


  However, he has not noticed Fish standing by the large banqueting hall doors.   

    Fish shouts, “Badger! My friends have arrived!” As a pride of impeccably dress lions enter the room. 

     Laughing loudly, Badger sneers, “You idiot, fish, do you really think lions will be on your side, they would prefer to eat you rather than me?”

      Fish steps forward, standing in front of the lions and looking defeated “you are right,”   he sighed. 


     Slowly from the top of his fishy head, Fish unzips his scaly skin suit, revealing an impeccably dress lion…


Norbury School, Harrow, London, UK.  Daniel, Belinda, Roshan, Zaki, Louisa, Batool, Chavaliay, Tayyibah, Malishka.

Comment by Alison murtha on March 6, 2014 at 11:31


A party had been arranged and was being held at Buckingham Palace in honour of a very important vote on who would become the Prime Minister. There were many candidates such as Clegg the Catfish, Cameron the Cod, Milliband the Mackerel and Gove the Guppy. Time passed and everyone was queuing outside, waiting for Elizabeth the Eel to cut the red ribbon. Once everyone had squished into the Palace, Elizabeth the Eel was organising proceedings. Then a slippery fish came up to Agnes the Badger with a glass of champagne and mumbled “blrblrub!” Agnes replied “You should really learn to talk you know, because otherwise no one will be able to understand you.”


Later on in the banquet, a mouse scampered up to Agnes the Badger and said “I’m a secret spy from MI5 and I’ve come to introduce you to my little friend called Andy the Ant!”

“I see what you mean about your friend being little, but what are you here for?” asked Agnes the Badger.

“We are here to catch a robber and we think we know who it is!” said Andy the Ant.


“The fish.”

“But it can’t be he is a slippery weirdo who can’t even talk,” replied Agnes the Badger.

“Don’t you mean a slippery genius with plans to blow up this Palace?”


By Oscar, Lauren and Lucy at Cockwood Primary School

Comment by Nicola Gowing on March 6, 2014 at 12:38

So as I stood, waiting to meet my wife, I saw him. He is a waiter, a fish waiter. There has always been a big distinction in the ways of the right and wrong in our newer, better developed animal kingdom and the fish were the most unlucky. Most of the other animals see them as a pure food source and nothing else, but not I. To me they are some of the most intellectual and interesting in the animal kingdom, yet they are treated as slaves. When we became this successful, we promised to stop the human’s ways of slavery and cruelty. Yet we use the fish as our waiters, our butlers…our slaves basically. The badgers, mice, shrews, bats, dogs and fellow pond dwellers water voles are all in an alliance trying to get rid of these disgusting habits. Yet all the other animals-including the barely accepted rats- are all trying to get rid of our voice.

As he passed I asked, “May I speak to your employer?”

The waiter replied, “Of course, please wait one moment” He walked off; I noticed he sounded a little hoarse, perhaps he was sick. Then I could fight for his rights through sickness at least.

Almost as soon as he left a rat walked up to the table, he was dressed as if he was fine but his dental care showed he wasn’t, it’s easy to tell now-a-days, between the rich and the poor. I may not be crazy rich but at least I’m not in the same social class as the rats. He picked up a lot of cheese and then wondered of mindlessly.

The fish returned but his face was slightly swollen, something had happened maybe a beating from his employer, huge infringements on our basic animal rights but according to most that doesn’t include fish.

“Sorry, my employer is very busy tonight…but he did you a favour…he fired me on the spot.”

“No!” I exclaimed, “He can’t do that, I wanted to offer a compliment and ask about some information for my research…”

“Research? For what?” His voice full of curiosity.

“Well it’s too much of a risk to speak here, meet me at the clock tower at midnight and I’ll explain everything…”

"Hello dear sorry I'm late," Perfect timing from my wife, like usual, " Oh sorry dear am I interrupting anything?"

"No my love everything's fine," I said and under my breath I added,"Make sure your there." And with that we went off to dance.

Jeta Sejko, Great Yarmouth High School


Comment by Vashti Turner on March 6, 2014 at 14:36

Inspector Badger

A cloudless sky overlooked a magnificent flourish of food and wealthy animals. Pillars encrusted with precious materials such as gold and silver reached towards the untouched spread of blue above.

“Adolf, go and fetch me some water, please. I’ll pay you some extra maggots for doing so,” instructed Inspector Badger Trump. Adolf modestly bowed his head and turned away. “I want this house party to be spectacular; remember to not mess up or there will be consequences!” the Inspector called after him. The badger then turned to the right with a toothy grin on his face. “Sir Ronald Squeaks-A-Lot! My, isn’t it great to see you again! How long has it been? 47 dog years?” Badger asked in a comical manner. The pair erupted into glorious, well-kept laughter.

“This is purely wonderful! Every cheese I could imagine is situated here. Fantastic!” exclaimed Sir Ronald as he loaded a plate.

“Well, I did order the finest foods from across the Globe, mind you.” Badger replied.

Suddenly, a scream erupted from the busy crowd. The room collapsed into silence. “What on Earth -?” Badger was interrupted by another scream.

“My friend, I am afraid to say that something is not right. Adolf!” Sir Ronald Squeaks-A-Lot shouted.

“Sir, it was Miss Otter. She has been poisoned!” Adolf replied.

The room exploded into chaos.

-          Sir Ronald flees the scene to find help –

Adolf sprinted in with a slight hint of despair in his step.

“Sir, it’s too late. It appears that she is dead.”

By Katie and Sebastian, Bacon’s College

Comment by Victoria Coe on March 6, 2014 at 15:56

Lemons are what I NEED!!!!

‘GET ME MY LEMON SOBET FRED!’ demanded Mr Tapperstronie. ‘Where is my lemon sorbet Fred!?’Roared Mr Tapperstronie.

‘Oh sir it’s coming,’ replied Fred.

‘I am very sorry for your loss,’ Mr Cheese Dunkin said in a sad voice.

‘Well hello dunkin what a great day to have a funeral,’ mumbled Mr Tapperstronie.

‘It’s not every day that your birthday is on a funeral day,’ he said faintly.

‘I don’t care about the loss I want my lemon sorbet, Fred where are you!!’ shouted Mr Tapperstronie.

‘Don’t worry I know it’s hard for you but you’ve just got to get over it,’ Mr Cheese dunkin said in a soft voice.

‘The only thing I care about is the loss of my lemon sorbet!’ screamed Mr Tapperstronie.

‘I want my lemon sorbet Fred I’ve had the worst day of my life today I just want my lemon sorbet!’ Mr Tapperstronie said whilst pointing at Fred’s face.

‘Hold on then it will be ready in just a minute,’ Fred said going to check the freezer.

‘Oh I’ve just looked in the freezer and there is no more lemon sorbets left!, ha ha ha ‘ Fred unkindly said.

Orchard Park Primary School - Leah, Phoenix, Keira

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