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Haiku for an Empty House

Winter. Stark sheets still.
Furniture wrapped like corpses.
No touch of hand. Dark.

Ice box walls and floors
Hold shrill cubes of frozen life,
Caught in their last scream.


Writing tips from Dave – follow the rules or break the rules – you’ll have a poem either way:
• For this opener each stanza is a haiku containing 3 lines of 5-7-5 syllables
• I’ve written it in the present tense
• Each stanza contains a kigo, which is a reference to a season
• There is a comparison in each stanza – a simile in the first, a metaphor in the second
• The house appears to have a history and may also have a future once the seasons progress

Views: 20

Comment by Nikki Heath on October 8, 2010 at 8:43
indoor, cold and wet
no one there, still and quiet
still, untouched for years

winter years go by,
people looking, not liking,
then new year begins.

by Kristen Barber Werneth School Stockport UK
Comment by Adrian Thompson Laisterdyke UK on October 8, 2010 at 10:29
New Year is starting
People are laughing
I can’t wait till Spring
By Inza, Iqrah and Nosheen, Laisterdyke, Bradford
Comment by Caroline Roche on October 8, 2010 at 12:04
The birds are chirping,
Kids are playing and laughing,
Chocolate Easter eggs.

Baby lambs are born,
What a happy atmosphere,
Bring on the summer!

Written by Stuart and Kyle.
Holmesdale Technology College.
Comment by Rosie Pike on October 8, 2010 at 13:41
The summer breeze
Open doors and go outside
Picnics on the grass

Beaches and harbours
Walking up the promenade
Late nights out, fun times

Summer time is up
Welcoming the autumn time
Light the roaring fire

A house once empty
Is now welcoming and warm
A new beginning

By Shona Reid and Rachel Cunningham. From Bishop’s Stortford College, Hertfordshire.
Comment by Dave Cryer on October 8, 2010 at 16:32
I love what you've all done this one, taking the poem right through the seasons and giving that sad house a happy ending. I wondered which way it would go when I set this one. Lovely work!

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